The Peace Walk (Part 2)
Part 2/3: The Peace Walk January 11, 2018. I encountered my sixth morning of unrest after yet another sleepless night since re-entering the city of Vancouver. For most, six consecutive nights of sleep deprivation make life challenging and uncomfortable. For me, with a body that is currently affected by Central Sensitivity Syndrome, sleep deprivation wrecks havoc. I am tightly furled with P A I N. There are many ways my morning could have gone from here. And I assure you, I have tried many of them. To be fully honest and transparent, a great deal of those paths ended in me feeling miserable, writing off the day, resenting my life and my circumstances, resenting others and what I perceived to be their better and more fulfilling lives, lying for hours in bed (this being in the context of pain but not one of my full blown crashes or more severely debilitated states that truly leaves me bedbound) feeling the pain and turning to YouTube or Netflix in an attempt to distract my mind from the suffering. The emphasis being my desire and decision to distract but not to actively and intentionally heal. This morning I tried a different, untested path. I breathed deeply. I breathed into the coiled up, burning, and stabbing points of pain. I breathed through the waves of nausea... and put on my clothes. I pulled on my boots. I stepped out the front door into the cold morning air and began to walk.